We have added thinking error number 16 to the list of errors. This new error is called avoiding should statements. The reason that this error has been added is due to several factors. One is because using it can allow a person to set them self up for failure. For example, a person may say in their personal self talk, “If I treat other people the right way, then they should treat me well also.” Looking at the statement from this view point, it can be seen that people do not always do what they should. When the person who is treated well acts unfairly to the person who said that statement, it sets this person up for a pain event. Now the thought process of the pain recipient has distorted thinking that can now justify their anger towards others.
Another example of the should thinking error is with guilt. A person may say, “I should clean the house, but I look at it and get discouraged.” Now this person has a set up for guilt. Instead of using a should statement, make a list of all the tasks that must be done to clean the house. Then do one of the items on the list at a time. That way the task is made easier and guilt is avoided.
The sixteenth thinking error of avoiding should statements has been added to the thinking error list of the materials page the this site. Please feel free to print a copy of the new list to have available.